1 month ago - edited
# HsL0VlKGURwo2nAF_________________________________________________
1. Name: Talulah
2. Current Rank: Master Sergeant (MSGT)
3. Steam ID: STEAM_0:1:69866305
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4. How many hours do you have on the server?:
1397 Hours; The gangstas' temperance demands justified allocations of servitude. As the hourglass trickles down, so does the temperance gradually settle within the soul. Time is but a fickle notion, at times plentiful yet seemingly volatile. The commonplace oftentimes take it all for granted, until their time comes...
Hui-Chieh:
The storm hasn't broken for days. The whole valley's snowed over.
The raspberry bushes still haven't budded. It's like spring'll never come.
We're trapped here, starving, dressed thin, and every silent day we pass waiting for the snow to melt drives us out of our minds.
You know, there's something about it all I find odd.
We've never once had a smooth time of it. Any better circumstances, and they'd go to shit fast the moment I get involved.
Maybe it really is like the Lungmenites say. I'm a bad omen. Nothing good comes of being around me.
Reminds me of something from a hell of a long time ago.
I've been thinking how I need to share my thoughts with you, in order to find peace.
~ December 14th
Hui-Chieh:
From where I left off. I ran for a very long time. Ran into a small village.
I didn't think too much about it at the time. I only wanted to find somewhere to hide. I didn't think I'd actually find somewhere to stay.
And I think that old couple thought of me as a daughter. Since their own sons and daughters had probably long since lost their lives to Ursus's countless wars.
They even kept my secret for me.
I'm sure I could've spent a lifetime repaying their kindness.
I regret that I never did.
~ January 13th
Hui-Chieh:
If memory serves me correctly, and I don't trust it to, the old man's name was Ivan Iziaslav.
A very common name. And he was the sort of peasant farmer you could find anywhere.
But he sacrificed himself. For a whole mess of reasons, he gave his own life...
I think about it every now and then. Am I truly worth people sacrificing their lives?
Alina went with me. She was gentle most other times, but would suddenly just come out with venomous tongue-lashings. That made me uncomfortable, to say the least.
The plan was proceeding smoothly.
In accordance with my own ideas, rapidly, the Infected of this place would surely unite as one.
I hoped it would be effective.
And I hoped it would be enough for the old man to rest peacefully. Aside from the old lady, no-one else had been closer family to me.
~ February 7th
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5. Why do you wish to become a 2LT?:
The requisitions of such a standing originate from a long forgotten ideal. Thou seek neither recompense nor company, but simple comprehension. Elucidate thy narrow mindedness, lest complacency rot the self. Far from home, sentenced to eternal condemnation, this one hath ventured far into no-mans land, in hopes of sanctuary and purpose. Thy comrades hath splintered into shimmering stars into the sky; 21st is no more. Yet despite the harrowing future that awaits, we too, must carry on their torch. We are the ones that must give meaning in their sacrifices. Henceforth, this one shall proclaim: Flesh-bearing Fighter, thou art to journey the nine seas, bare witness to the ruins of golden ages, and finally reach enlightenment at the origin of desolation. Only then, will the tempering finally bloom into fruition.
If this is not the end... Then I will keep walking
Until I witness... The end of this journey.
But I will never submit... To this idea of fate.
Never!
Hui-Chieh:
No one would offer the Infected any help. We were no volunteer army. We had nothing like the "Brave Wok" from the age of Mikhail the Huge Ears. We had no city of our own, and we hardly even had fields to hill up.
"The Originium grows on our skin, and the scant few weapons we hold are stark. The snow in our mouths melts into our water, our stomachs are filled with grass seed and bark."
And so they sang. I learned a good few of those in short order.
We were just some Infected with nowhere to go.
I became more and more sure. Coming to the Northern Tundra first was the right choice. Nothing but people with nowhere to return, and nowhere to go, wherever you went.
The Infected in the cities, singled out by the common folk. The races of each country looking on one another with suspicion of their differences. Only out on the tundra do people become a little simpler.
I wanted to go back south. But this time, I probably wouldn't be going alone.
Infected dying of frostbite and hunger on the tundra is not the same as Infected dying of their illness on their own land. The Infected should pioneer their own city. If Ursus doesn't allow it, then Ursus should be changed.
Exile, abdication, leaving the country– in the end, you were still a homeless vagabond. Whenever you told of a place that'd admit the Infected, you were telling a fairytale.
If the Infected wanted to regain their dignity, they needed strength, unity and a change in the status quo.
If we could gain the backing of the Infected guerrillas, then maybe this quest of ours would have some chance of success.
It was important for the Infected to regain their confidence. It was crucial for us to have any sense of meaning in our lives.
Back when I first became Infected, my mind wasn't clear on anything.
I knew Kashchey wanted to use me to do so much, but I was always afraid. What was it he wanted me to do?
Had he planned some kind of trick, one to destroy in a blink of an eye the network of Infected I'd spent so much time setting up?
Or had he planned to let me divide the Infected? Let them drift into two camps, the urbanites and the settlers?
Or the even more frightening scenario- perhaps he'd planned for the infected to become a new army, and for Ursus to be plunged into war once more?
I could only speculate. He hung over my head like a murky specter, impossible to chase off.
But I could only move onward.
One of the Yetis, apparently called Petrova, used cystymilk yesterday to stir-fry oilseeds. A strange recipe, for sure. The taste was pretty interesting.
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6. What makes you qualified to become a 2LT over other candidates?:
Thou art a humble wayfarer, a seeker of archaic notions, and a tempered soul albeit still seeking finer touches. A pilgrim if you will, distraught on a seamlessly endless ambition devoid of sanctuary. The long journey ahead shall push mind and body to the breaking point. For true growth, one must seek to break their inner shell; the cocoon that sheltered thy development. Ye who seeketh the ideal, thou art to trudge along the desolate pathway that covers the bountiful joy we once gazed upon.
Hui-Chieh:
We have been heading south.
The guerrillas are hoping to get to as many mines as possible before the extermination plan gets underway to save as many Infected as we can.
The garrison is falling back, and we are pushing further and further ahead.
To outsiders, it probably looks like we are hunting down the Ursus squads. That couldn't be further from the truth, and it's a nigh impossible task.
We are hiding from the Ursus Army while also trying to save the Infected from under their nose.
If you ask me why we are doing this, I guess all I can tell you is, "It's what we are supposed to do."
That being said, I can't help but feel that by taking in all these Infected, thus giving the other teams some breathing room, we may be playing into Mr. Patriot's hand.
Patriot might have drawn a line. A line that we dare not to cross.
To cross that line is to fight the Ursus garrison head-on– a tall order, it goes without saying. It's either that or keeping ourselves under the radar.
In other words, we'll have to leave the tundra, and that means infiltrating the real Ursus territory– their nomadic cities, where all aspects of life are ruled with their iron fist.
At that point, the guerrillas put their weapons away until it's time for us to take up arms again.
The treatment of the Infected in the cities and ships out in the wild are bound to be even more cruel. I imagine the days that are to come will be very difficult.
It's not easy to take this step.
But this is the Northwestern Tundra... There's nothing but snow here.
We can't feed all these mouths with just snow.
~ November 3rd
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7. What is the job of a 2LT in the Battalion?:
Lay down thy arms, thy soul; body and flesh alike, together as one. Guide thy peers, foster thy fellowship, and fortify thine ideal. Thou art to be poised with an unfaltering fealty to a vainglorious cause, perhaps devoid of tangible merit. Nonetheless, one shall seek to push against the drowning tides. If hope is to ever exist, it must be sanctioned into its conceptualization.
Every important figure in history was checked by others around them.
By overcoming such interference, one could change the world.
Hui-Chieh:
I don't know how much further I have to go.
I can hear the winter feathers chirp every now and then. Is that supposed to mean something? Does it mean that spring will be here soon?
It's still very cold here, but it shouldn't be much longer until it starts to get warmer.
It's been three weeks. We've finally found two more villages willing to trade with the Infected.
We've set up camp at an abandoned settlement a few kilometers away from them. There's plenty of fuel here to last us a while.
You can't imagine how awful tree bark tastes. I don't ever want to listen to the old man tell me how nutritious they are anymore.
~ December 7th
I am very well aware where this road is taking us.
Nonetheless, we have to get to the end of the road. Even if I don't make it, Yelena, Alina, and Eno and Sasha as well... I am sure they will make it.
But the road beneath our feet is just way too murky and hard to see.
Will they reject us? We can't bring their hopes up too much.
It's a bad thing to make a promise you cannot fulfill. The Ursus Empire's promise about bread and bed was nothing more than a ruse to cover up their atrocities and lies. And lies are what lead to tyranny.
Will they come to loathe us? It's very likely. If it wasn't for how hard life is in the Northern Plains, people here would probably report the Infected to the Patrol Unit the moment they spotted them.
This kind of animosity probably came from how worried they are about their own situation.
I'm not like Buldrokkas'tee. We certainly need to be on the lookout and avoid that, but I don't believe that's in their nature.
We can't hold it against them just because they want to look out for themselves. Definitely not.
Will they try to hurt us? I have no idea. And it's probably not something I can worry about too much...
No matter the case... I think most people are only like that because of circumstances they are in.
If they had a teacher like Alina, a team like ours, or the chance to live in harmony with Infected... I'm sure things would improve.
Most of them were simply brainwashed by Ursus's twisted ideology. We can help them. Knowledge can change the way people think.
It's just... it's a really difficult thing to do. That's even though I believe... if you always hold fast to your beliefs in your actions, getting everyone to accept the truth should be one of the simplest things to accomplish.
The words above were crossed out. Naturally, the letter was never mailed out.
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8. Why should you be trusted with 2LT?:
A refugee, a traitor, a sinner… Falsifier of truth, religion, and the blasphemer to mankind. All are but monikers that embody a facet of thine. To see beyond the tinted glass requires a fortitude and insight beyond the norm. We are all humble plebians, stuck in the never-ending cyclical loop of violence. The strong deprive all of there is to the weak. Rob them of their land, their food, their way of life, and the ideologies they once held dear. The masses bleed themselves dry, and the nobility alike are none the less; equally contributing to violence. Humans are fundamentally flawed. We strive for perfection, yet by doing so, becomes our undoing. We simply cannot help but be drawn closer to our demise. Like moths to a flame. For one to become beyond this is nothing more than mere fantasy, for in due time one must acknowledge the kleshas that bind oneself.
Hui-Chieh:
The snow hasn't melted. And spring hasn't come.
It feels like this next spring is never going to arrive.
Each time I lift my head up to see the candlelight, I just cannot help but to reach my hand out to put it out, only to light up anew in the darkness.
Please go away soon, winter. If you don't go away soon, we'll be buried by all this snow.
Please, I beg of you.
~ February 21st
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It was what left the deepest impression on her current self. It was the day her "noble life" came to an end.
No matter should all people in sum desire to reach one single good outcome– –those people, as ever, still may fail.
Talulah, Talulah It is because that golden outcome of theirs, and your daydreams, are fundamentally distinct.
You have no ability to make differing people endorse some identical action. Their disputes will clash and devolve, and that cannot be avoided.
How can a Sarkaz face a Sankta? How can a soul from Kazimierz face a soul from Ursus? How can a sturdy yet toilsome bear face an arrogant yet impotent hippogryph?
You think to let them know how to act? What an arrogant notion, my daughter!
You wish to take this appearance and this rank of yours, and appeal to them to do something?
Ah, of course, this I know. You certainly could do so.
Talulah, in time, you will rule those destined to follow you.
You have inherited the Black Snake's knowledge, the Red Dragon's blood flows through you, you walk the Bear's land, and you thumb through Hippogryph's history.
No person should be born to be ruled by another.
But they crave your rule.
For all their lives, they've been awaiting someone like you to rule over them.
Ursus may well tremble for you, my daughter.
Those who rule others will inevitably be ruled themselves by the stronger, Kashchey.
Ah, now that is a concept close to me, Talulah.
Let me give you your final lesson, then.
...Hm?
Talulah, we will come to transcend this sort of transient, worldly rule. The last Emperor is dead, yet his shadow is still cast upon these great lands of ours. His will, his force of mind, have already passed beyond that era. He inherited the true Empire of Ursus, sustains Ursus's flourishing lands, lets the people of Ursus live.
Should we lose the sun, the luxuriant branches and stems that Ursus grows will at once wither away, and all that will remain across this world is inferior creatures, ever more putrid, sucking the nutrients from each other. These people you have seen- They take pleasure in savagery, widespread slaughter, masochism, and are at once fearful and selfish... You dream of education and ideology to draw them in, enlighten them. But you don't know that they bear not the slightest interest in what you have to say...
Talulah, you deserve to know this. They have survived across this world of ours for countless years, and have become accustomed to a certain deep-rooted way of life. You are merely but a stranger, crashing in on it. So-called rulers, so-called nobles, so-called armies... merely the people of strength, the people lapped in luxury, the people who withstood training.
Domains can shift, armies can rebuild, rules can fall to ruin... No rule can endure, except where the voluntary will of Ursus's people follows. They will never be ruled. They only press forth, forever. -The small charity you make is exchanged for obedience. For unrealistic expectations.
And how the hell would you know what they're meant to be? It was Ursus that ravaged them to this point!
I am very clear about it. Ah, I am all too clear about it. And this is why you think they will go with you? For their bread, their potatoes, their clean water and bonfires? Is this how you would promise them? They will. And then, once they starve, their first thought will be to make a meal of your corpse. If you carry such unrealistic fantasies of them, you will hate them. You will surely hate them.
Kashchey, I am not you. I am nothing whatsoever like you.
Yet you are already the same as me. You simply have not been roused from your daydreams yet. In truth, you can and may leverage all you have at hand. If you have some goal, then go. Use terror to destroy terror. Use life to rule life. Use sacrifice to guide sacrifice. Use ignorance to breed ignorance. Use suffering to manufacture suffering.
You have learned all of these methods. They are already your arms. All that's left is to learn to make use of them... to get used to them. Until your beloved people understand, in the truest sense of the word, their country, and the significance of their existence.
I can't even tell what you're spouting all this hell-ridden doctrine for, if anything.
All this is fact. All this, you will confront. How about this, my daughter. You don't trust me.
So I wish to make a wager with you. In these many years, the Originium Arts I have cultivated in you have long since budded. Their time to fruit is already now.
...What... did...?
In your life to come, you need only raise doubt of all you persist in, you need only raise the slightest hatred of the ones you proclaim your compatriots, and those you think ought to be free... And you will immediately settle this wager between us. It is whether, in that moment, you will walk the path I taught you. Perhaps, in these coming years, you will be fortunate enough to avoid those conditions yet.
You may, with sheer luck, be living within a fairytale land. Perhaps the people before you will chance to have secret sorrows. They can be understood, explained- oh, they were forced into helplessness... I can wait.
This country can wait. Be it three years, five years, a decade, a century, you will only arrive at the same answer. Though you will not live an Infected's life for long, I know that day will come. The Empire of Ursus finds itself in a period of repeated ailment. Crops will not grow on the soil of the barrens. Soil in shadow can only bear forth flowers of corruption.
You may be betrayed by those you adored. You may witness the moments in which your friends die for you. You may realize the expectations you held for the future have lost all meaning. Because all that you do, in other people's eyes, still cannot make up for the pressure you bring about with your appearance, and your status. You will realize it all can be sacrificed. You will realize that they all love themselves more than their neighbors. You will come to know that your proud struggle symbolizes nothing at all.
You will come to see. These great lands you threw yourself to do not want you. You will see your thoughts, your actions, become nonexistent. You will see them spurn all you revered, your life, your dignity, and philosophy void of all significance. Because these people, who you suppose to call noble, are but ambling corpses. All I have encountered, you will encounter too.
You want... You want me to... surrender...!
No, no. I truly am using these Originium Arts. This is no deception, nor a threat.
Oh, that said, my Arts are utterly feeble. All I have taught you constitutes the foundations of these Arts.
These Arts, in the moment you reject me, will carry no impact whatsoever.
But should you recognize me, should you have understood me, should you realize just the sort of world you're standing in...
–Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Chime. Chime. Chime.
You will become me.
Ursus's future will from then on be in your hands.
...What are you talking about?
What do you... what do you mean by all this?
Conscious manipulation? Thought suggestion? Have you gone insane? It was you who taught me to withstand these Arts! It was you who taught me how to break free from the psyche's Originium Arts!
Stop.
Why would I use such contemptible, destructive Arts on my own heir?
My Arts only expedited a course of events. Expedited your recognition of this great world of ours, your questioning yourself, doubting yourself, loathing yourself, and seeing clearly, anew, your own course.
Sans these Arts, all this still would have happened. They were just to get you there a little faster.
Everyone in the city, living a make-believe normal life, has learned to hypnotize themselves.
They are skilled in escaping from facts, taming themselves with rules and morals. Using the lowly shell of the loser to hide just how easily harmed they are by cruel reality...
But I have supplied you a set of armor, a sort of arms, and an ego.
These can save you your self-doubt and self-harm, in the course of it all. Save you your distress, your struggle. Conserve your time. You will stand up ever faster than you were kicked down by reality, and you will be reborn.
You needn't spend too much of your life denying your own self.
All I have taught you will once again bear anew within your mind, and you will, as if spinning silk from the cocoon, weave anew the knowledge.
You will rid yourself of your superstitions, and in your well-rounded garden of wisdom, find a path winding yet with certain end.
Talulah, Ursus's destiny breathes as one with you.
The Black Snake shall walk with you. This immortal will shall never die.
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You will see.
No…
Your thoughts, your actions, become nonexistent.
No.
They make me sick.
No!
They don't deserve to live.
No!
You will see them spurn all you revered, your life, your dignity, and philosophy void of all significance.
No...
There will be no peace in these lands while people like you still walk them.
No, no, no...
Stop...
I...
Stop!
...hate you.
But should you recognize me, should you have understood me, should you realize just the sort of world you're standing in...
Ursus's future will from then on be in your hands.
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I'm not here to determine which of you is right or wrong. It's not my place to.
But for now, just take them away from here. Take everyone who's willing to leave the city with us.
Hui-chieh might manage to prevent the Victorians from harassing us in the short term, but we'll still have to prepare for the worst.
Are you giving me an order, Talulah?
No, I'm offering my opinion.
But where can you go?
Your identities are too conspicuous.
Is this where you say we should go to Rhodes Island?
Yes. I have to see the both of you judged.
But not right now. Many Infected are still relying on you, and I can't just leave them in the dust.
Hah... Classic Officer Ch'en.
Want my opinion?
Whenever Talulah proactively offers her thoughts to Nine, it often leaves the Phidia with even more doubts towards her.
But Talulah has never fallen behind.
She always walks silently in the center of their group, so inconspicuous that people forget she exists.
Reunion's leader, Kashchey's adopted daughter, and the manipulative mastermind behind the Chernobog disaster.
Talulah, regarded as a hero by Infected who do not know the truth.
Her sword begins to burn, and its flames spread across the floor. They jump and fall, outlining a symbol.
The firelight reflects in the trio's eyes, but their faces still bear some gloom—the mark once represented a dark past.
Within it hides all sorts of crimes and injustices, certain to sting if revealed for all to see.
Ursus.
We can go back to Ursus.
......
...That's a terrible idea.
What, thinking about your unfinished business over there?
No, I want to right my wrongs.
I've received news from Ursus. The Infected are breaking their shackles and congregating on the tundra again.
They claim to be answering the call of Reunion, and have decided to stand up and fight for the rights and freedoms the Infected and other oppressed deserve.
They were inspired by a lie, but their determination to fight back is certainly real.
So they gave you the courage to recall the good old days?
...It's not only Infected over there. There are students, exiled officers and soldiers, guilt-ridden nobles…
It's exactly the strength you need.
Strength that ignores the differences in race or identity and crushes the fear of disease, united by a common goal.
Besides, it'll take time to leave with this many people... and I think that should be long enough for you to explain Guard's precious dream to those still willing to follow you.
...You don't want to restore Reunion's reputation?
No. I never expected it to hold such a large influence even today.
Even if the Ursus Empire has long since covered up what happened at Chernobog.
The voices craving resistance are like water. They might be burnt and dry up, but they'll eventually return to the land as rain.
Returning to Ursus is easier said than done. There are too many factors involved, and more things for me to confirm.
That's your problem. Not ours.
Talulah…
Even if Reunion can turn a new leaf, representing once again freedom and happiness…
What about you, Talulah? Your sins can't be washed away. Your existence is Reunion's darkest history.
How can you face the pure-white tundra as you are?
I know that I stand here today no longer as a leader, but as a symbol, a flag, or even... a weapon to be wielded.
But I'll take it. I'll accept the shackles you place on me. I've had many different identities—Draco, noble, leader, Infected... None of these matter anymore.
Today I remain only someone who once scattered the seeds of sin.
The wrongs I committed in Ursus, I will repay in Ursus.
Repay... you make it sound so simple.
I will not act as just a flag this time.
Then how?
I'll throw myself into a true blaze and let it all burn, until even the tundra's chill melts away.
......
I'll go back to Ursus... to truly face my own trial.
And you can be there to witness it, Nine.
Witness the end of Reunion, and the birth of something new from its corpse. That's what you truly want, is it not?
You really don't mind?
The Reunion of my heart died long ago on the tundra... along with my companions.
......
......
I'll go with you.
Scared I'll harm more innocents?
Both you and Nine.
After following Reunion for a while, I can confirm that the group has changed somewhat.
For good or bad... I can't say.
I don't want to miss your trial, but I also don't want to jump to any hasty conclusions about whether the path Nine insists on is correct.
From now on, I'll keep an eye on you as Rhodes Island Operator Ch'en.
I need to keep Rhodes Island informed, no matter what happens in Ursus.
Talulah, Nine... I'm responsible for you both.
...Whatever.
Now, you should probably get going. Leave the soldiers to me. I'll catch up after I make sure they're okay.
We didn't say we'd wait for you.
Have you ever? I've always had to catch up on my own.
Hmph.
Onwards to Ursus then.
......
Onwards to Ursus.
The flames continue to spread slowly from the tip of the blade.
Hot flames lick the bodies piled up in a corner, gently enveloping them.
Amid the light crackling of the fire, Talulah silently prays for the flames to bring them to a brighter and warmer place.
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